Praise the Lord!

PRAISE THE LORD!!! So, as you can tell, we got good news yesterday! The tumor is not growing! Of course, we always want to hear that its shrinking or better yet, gone, but I truly believe we will hear that some day and until then, the next best thing is that its not growing.

The day went ok. Her MRI was scheduled for 12:30, so we left for Indy that morning. She can't have anything to eat or drink the day of so that's always a little rough. Also, she's really starting to understand and anticipate what's ahead...a part of this I've always dreaded. We walked in the hospital and the first thing out of her mouth was, "Is this going to be scary, mommy? Please don't leave me, mommy." It took everything in me to keep from crying right there. Its just so hard to watch your child go through something like this. For the next hour of waiting she just wanted to be held...she was clearly scared. Because she no longer has the port, she has to be put out with the gas mask, which is hard. They let me hold her as they used the mask. I sang to her the entire time. She took it pretty well. But she woke up hard. They tried several pokes to get a good vein in her hands but couldn't find one so they had to use a vein in her foot. She was crying pretty hard from it hurting badly. She was very glad to get it out! And she's very, very proud of her Strawberry Shortcake band-aid and doesn't want to take it off!

Waiting for results is one of the hardest parts of the day...my mind always takes me down this horrible road as we sit in the cancer clinic just waiting for the dr. to walk down the hall with our results. She said the tumor looks exactly the same! No growth!


Thank you so much for your prayers. The Lord hears and is answering! He has truly blessed us with amazing prayer warriors and support. We love you all!

I promise to try and update sooner! And, yes, Christian still promises to update about his and Claudia's Disney trip. So until then...

MRI ahead...

Wow. Life has been so crazy. And busy. And, um interesting. And...I am blessed. I'm going to let all the pictures below tell the story of all we have been up to lately (sorry if you have dial-up, there's a TON of pic.'s), but before that, I'll give you a very quick update. (And I mean quick this time!)


I think Claudia falls more in love with her little sister every day...and so do we. Kendall LOVES being held and cuddled, and will let you know this when you set her down. She loves being talked to and does her best to try and talk back. It's really cute. We haven't quite got the sleeping thing down yet. In fact, we don't have it down at all. Kendall cries most of the night, which in turn, keeps Claudia up, which in turn means we're all up!!! Kendall has been settling down to sleep around 6 am...yes, in the morning. Claudia has been waking up around 3 am and wanting to play. Needless to say, I've never been this sleep deprived in my life! However, I know this too shall pass! Its just so cute to see Claudia with Kendall...she's so in love with her. She (Claudia) still needs to learn the whole "personal space" thing...poor Kendall!

On another note, we are asking for your prayer again. Claudia has her next MRI this next Tues. (Oct. 16). This will be her first standard MRI without her port...which means more needles and IV's...something we're very much not looking forward to. I'm so ready for this dumb thing to just shrivel up and BE GONE! I will keep you updated. Lord, please calm my heart. You know the anxiety these procedures bring. Please heal our baby girl...YOU ARE ABLE!

Now, here's what our family has been up to...

The end of August, Nate & Olivia (Christian's brother) had another little boy. Owen Smith arrived 2 weeks early (I think that's right)! This is Nate with their newest addition and Abraham (almost 3 yrs.)

Olivia and Owen.


On September 2nd, my parents celebrated their 40th Anniversary!

We all celebrated with dinner at The Boathouse and cake/icecream at the house. One of the presents we sisters went together and got them was tickets to the Bill Gaither and Homecoming Friends concert a few weeks ago! "Tis (still) Wonderful!" (For those of you who understand that!)

Their 40th brought everyone together for a family picture! (Is it obvious how "thrilled" the guys were?!)

At the end of Sept., we were off to Florida to visit Christian's mom and dad and to attend his cousin, Erin's wedding. We took the camper so the 15 hour trip with a baby and toddler wasn't TOO bad! (Sarcasm!) But, its always worth it and we had a fun time visiting family! We also got to meet Christian's cousin, Devin's new little guy, Peyton (one week older than Kendall)! It stinks we forgot our camera that day. Below is Christian with the girls at the beach, we only went one day...it was pretty windy, so it didn't last long!

Because of the wind, the sand was blowing pretty hard so Claudia proudly wore my sunglasses the whole time! She LOVES the beach!

The wedding was beautiful. The weather called for rain, but it passed over and the evening was perfect. Congratulations Erin and Bradley!

Our family at the wedding.

Claudia with the two little flower girls, Ava and Madeline (2nd cousins to Claudia!) They were adorable!

Dancing with daddy at the reception.

Aunt Tara (Christian's dad's sister...and mother of the bride!) and Kendall.

After arriving back from Florida, a week later, Christian's parents were up to Indiana for his dad's training and another visit! One night we all went to Ft. Wayne to visit Nate and Olivia...which was the first time they had seen Owen! Here's cousins and great buds, Abraham and Claudia.

The three brothers, Nate, Christian and Dale.

Here's Grandma reading to the grandkids.

Another day, we all went to the Ft. Wayne Zoo! It was the first time Claudia had been to the zoo! SHE LOVED IT! Here's the cousins at the kangaroo exhibit.

The gang watching the sea lions!

The McCray girls at the zoo! (Christian still can't believe he's got a family of all women! He constantly says how sorry he feels for what my dad went through! Just wait until they're teenagers Christian! You ain't seen nothin' yet!!!)

Christian and his mamma (in the rain forest!)

Claudia rode the carousel with A.Olivia, U.Nate and Abraham!

We all met up at Casa's Restaurant another night.

Grandma and Pa got Claudia and Abraham rollar skates and the whole protective gear to go along. So we got them all suited up and let them try! It was hilarious!

Ready to go!

She did, um, well, she needs A LOT more practice...or help!

The whole family together (minus Andrea)! We can't wait until Thanksgiving when we'll all be together again! :)

Oct. 2, Kim turned 36!!! So we had another party...

Even Janelle and her boyfriend, Doug, came down from Chicago! (Which by the way, please pray for Janelle, she just found out she has mono. Yuck.) And notice, Grandpa Kessler isn't wearing glasses anymore, his caterac surgery was very successful!

The other day, I came around the corner to find Claudia playing with Kendall...if you can't tell, she has one of her old port/tubes. She had it tucked up in Kendall's shirt and she's giving her "injections". She's still got the procedure down perfectly. Like I said in a previous post, its times like these, the reality of all she's been through hits home.

My cousin Steve and his wife Freya (who live in Bremen, about 1/2 hr. away), just had their second little boy last week, so my sisters, mom and I went to visit...all together in the the RV...just like the Beverly Hillbillies! The kids were so excited and couldn't wait. So, here we are on our way. The twins didn't know what to think!

This is where the kids spent most of the trip...up on the top bunk. (I know, I know, they should be in their carseats...)

And here is my mom and sister, Jenny, getting a look at Henry Samuel Varner for the first time (with Freya)!

They ordered pizza for us so here is Steve, Freya, their other son, Max, my Aunt Beverly, my mom and Lynae.

"Weeeeee're sisters!!!" My mom (on the right) and Aunt. My Aunt Beverly was in town (from Kansas) to help out the first week so it was a lot of fun to see her as well!

My cousin Steve playing "referee" for all the kids. (I hope our large clan didn't terrorize their night too much!)

And lastly, I'll leave you with some updated pictures of Kendall. She's getting so big, so fast. Last dr.'s appt., she weighed in at 14 lbs. putting her in the 95th percentile for her age! That's my girl!

She smiles soooo much now, especially when you talk to her! She'll even smile when she hears my voice! But do you think I could get a single picture of her smiling? Nope. She smiles real big and by the time the picture takes, she has this frown...I give up!

This picture doesn't do her rolls justice!!!!

2 1/2 months

If she's not smiling, this is the look she has on her face. Everyone always comments on how "serious" she looks! (And yeah, I know, she looks EXACTLY like her daddy!)

As I'm reflecting upon all that's gone on these past couple of months...and as I look at this beautiful family God has given me, I can't help but thank Him...I'm soooo blessed!

I'll keep you updated on Claudia's MRI results. Thank you so much for your prayers. We love you all!

She's here!!!!

She's finally here! Kendall Faith was born Thursday, July 19th around 5pm.

I've sat down at the computer to write this post about 20 times but between a crying baby, a big sister (aka as Claudia!!) trying to "help" a little too much, to...you name it...I haven't had time. Sooo...here's my attempt. For now, because of time (or lack of!), I'm going to just give details and tell as much as I can with pictures and continue it later when I have more time.

My actual due date was July 29th, but because Claudia was so big and caused quite a bit of "damage" my Dr. decided to induce me early. He set the date for the 18th mainly because this would be his first day back from vacation. Knowing when I was going in was nice but also kind of "nerve wracking" so we tried to have as much fun before and spend some special time with Claudia before the big "day" (or should I say changing-experience-for-a-lifetime!).

Typical (pre-baby!) summer day...swimming with the cousins. Of course, whenever we hear the icecream truck we all sprint to the front yard (even though we could easily buy a whole gallon of icecream for what they charge for a popsickle!)

"Nobody in the pool until ALL your icecream has been eaten!" (We've had too many chunks of chocolate and sticks mysteriously floating in the pool!)We swam almost every day...before the baby that is. (We'll stick to a picture of Christian and Claudia - I wouldn't want you to mistake me for a beached whale!!!)

The day before my induction, we got a group of people together and went to Tokens-N-Tickets for dinner and games.

Our last family picture as 3!

We then went over to my parents (who have a neighborhood full of kids) and Christian-the-pyro set off the rest of the fireworks we had left over from the 4th of July. But before the show, we just HAD to go frog hunting! My parents have a big pond across the street and the kids LOVE hunting for frogs. When the fireworks show was over, Grandma had icecream cones waiting for everyone inside. It was a fun night...and even despite the excitement and anticipation of meeting Kendall, I couldn't help but feel a sense of dread on the ride home!

The day before, we got everything out and ready to go...I came around the corner and found Claudia trying out Kendall's carseat! She had it buckled and all! I laughed so hard!

I was scheduled to be at the hospital around 8pm the 18th. The plan was for them to give me a drug overnight, not necessarily to start labor, but to get my body "ready" to make induction easier the next morning around 7am. Here I am, all hooked up and signing all the paperwork. Christian and Claudia stayed with me until her bedtime and then went home so we could ALL get a good night's sleep...YEAH RIGHT...my labor started around 1am that night. It was bearable, but I was definitely ready for the Dr. (and epidural!) that next morning!

I really am happy here! I promise! Ok...long story short...Dr. came around 7:30 to start Pitocen, but because of various reasons (like having an intern nurse that didn't know what she was doing and the Dr. being in multiple c-sections), they didn't get it started until 9:30ish. They didn't get my epidural started until this time either - which was another ordeal in itself. The first epidural didn't work, so they tried it again about a half hour later. Ouch!! And even that one didn't work...my legs were so numb and heavy that they actually hurt and yet I could feel every thing from waist up! They tried all sorts of things but there were 7 births happening the same time as me and she was constantly in surgery (c-sections) so they never did get it right. So during the absolute hardest part of labor, I felt everything, but couldn't move because of my legs. It was pretty rough. By around 3:30pm, it was getting pretty unbearable and I wasn't dilating past 5 cm, the nurse said I would most likely be in labor for at least 3+ hours, Dr. wasn't available, anaesthesiologist wasn't available so I gave in and took this one drug that made me so loopy, I barely remember anything else. The worst part is, moments after they gave me this drug, the Dr. came in and said I was ready to push....30 minutes later we had Kendall Faith!!! The delivery couldn't have gone better! Praise the Lord! Unfortunately, like I said, I was in and out of it and don't remember much more of the day. People came to see me that night and I don't remember it. I'm so sad to have missed these first special moments...BUT the great delivery and healthy arrival of our little girl far outweighs it all! I don't remember a lot, but Kendall cried for at least her first 2 hours of life. We were all a little worried, but after she finally nursed, she calmed down and hasn't (barely!) cried since! She was a 7 lbs. 12.5 oz., 20.5 inches

This is the first time Claudia met Kendall. I could NOT wait to see her face and how she would react...we had waited and talked about this for so long and Claudia was SOOOOO excited. I don't remember a lot...just that Claudia was a little upset because she wouldn't quit crying!

Yep, she looks exactly like Christian...exactly. (When I get time, I'll scan one of his baby pictures for you to compare...they look so much alike, its kinda scary!)

She's getting ready to cry so she's really making a sour face but I love this picture because it shows her little legs and arms still all curled up. I read that if you take a picture soon enough after they're born, you can see how they were most likely curled up in the womb before they came out.

Claudia is soooo proud of her! She's ALWAYS touching, kissing, hugging, poking....just IN HER FACE! If allowed, she would probably hold her all day. This has actually been the most difficult part. And if told to leave her alone, she starts crying and says, "But she's my sister!" She's also quite possessive of her. She cries if everyone else gets to hold her. She definitely loves her little sister!

Her first bath. I'm not sure she necessarily liked it, but she didn't cry one bit.

One of the rare moments she has her eyes open. And yep, she's got the crazy hair! Everyone always asks if Claudia's was like this...believe it or not, her's was longer, thicker and even more crazy!!!!

Christian has done a really good job of giving Claudia some special attention throughout this transition time. (In fact, I've FINALLY talked him into doing a post...he's agreed to do the next one and tell about his and Claudia's trip to Disney World last week! So stay tuned...) Here they are at my parent's after catching a big bass! Claudia loves touching and holding the fish. However, the day wasn't without drama...

...Christian got a hook caught in his finger. All the woman begged him to go to the Dr. but, no, he decided to soak it in cold water (to numb it up) and my dad yanked it out. OUCH!!!

The two sisters! I love these girls!

A few more of Kendall...

There's so much more to tell, and so many more pictures. (Next time, I'll have to explain how we chose her name and the crazy story around that!) In fact, these are from last week and she's already changed so much (she gained over a pound in less than 2 weeks!). But for now, Kendall is "calling" me as Claudia begs me to hold her, so, I'll have to continue this later when I get some more time...until then, I'll leave you with one of my favorites...